Under the Oaks: 6 a.m.

is not a good time to decide what kind of day you're going to have.

Welcome to Under the Oaks, a quiet place to sit and read in the Land of Oaks and Roses.

I’m writing to you from Camp Mommy. Aka the 3 post-camp weeks before school starts. I haven’t been looking forward to these weeks. It might be fair to say that I’ve been dreading them. To confirm my bad attitude, my son woke up at 6 a.m. on day 1. This is usually my writing/reading/thinking/drinking coffee in silence time. “Ugh! I knew it! This is going to be unreasonable!” I thought to myself. I decided that it was going to be a bad day followed by another bad day followed by many more bad days. I grumbled to myself about how I’d never be able to write my newsletter as I begrudgingly made my way to his room.

I opened his door and gave him a long, annoyed stare. “Hi mom,” he said in the sweetest voice possible. I couldn’t help but smile. I picked up my beautiful boy and together we tip toed downstairs in hopes of not waking the rest of the house. As I was about to bulldoze my way through making breakfast while getting pulled on every 5 seconds, I noticed a weird spaciousness. I turned around and saw my little 2-year-old sitting with a pile of mismatched toys. “Shhhh,” he said, “I play quietly.” Another unanticipated smile appeared on my face despite my mind’s continuing (and excellent) counterarguments.

Eventually, breakfast was made and my daughter was up. We were outside by 9 a.m. (my best advice for any hard thing is to get yourself outside as quickly as possible.) It was a perfect 75-degree morning. The sun’s gentleness felt like a congratulatory gift for making it outside without yelling at anyone. I grabbed a seat at our favorite playground bench under the big tree and my kids took off to find their friends on slides and swings.

under the big tree

I found myself sitting without kids yelling or grabbing for me. “I give it 5 minutes,” my protective mind warned. I waited 5 minutes. Still nothing. Not even a “look at me mom” from either of them. I pulled out my book and fearfully read a sentence while simultaneously anticipating the inevitable mid-sentence interruption that would soon follow. But still, nothing. Instead, I heard a chirp above my head. I looked up to find a red cardinal sitting above me. He gave me a puzzled look, as if he was wondering how someone could maintain this many negative thoughts on such a perfect day. He flew back and forth in front of me, further animating his confusion. Next, he flew away from me and towards my kids who were choosing characters, assigning roles and hugging and chasing their friends with complete presence and glee. I put my book down, looked up at our tree and paused for awhile. I watched as words dropped down one by one, telling me what this week’s newsletter would be. I quickly caught them in my phone before looking up again to find my kids squealing while mixing with sticks and rocks among a circle of little heads. It struck me that there was no where else I’d rather be and nothing else I’d rather be doing than exactly what I was getting to do that day. I looked up at the tree again. Some advice came down next: “6 a.m. is not a good time to decide what kind of day you’re going to have.”

One Last Thing

For anyone who needs some positivity this week, I started a list in Notes on my phone called “Good Things Are Always Happening To Me.” Everyday, I add something to it. Sometimes a bunch of things. The days when it’s hard to find things are the ones when it’s most helpful to. It’s kind of crazy how something so simple and quick (and free!) has made me feel so good. Highly recommend! And thank you to

Jordan Younger

for the idea <3

See you next week!